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Summer Issue 2010

More Bob the Beagle

by Pat Hamit

Can’t Make a Silk Purse out of a Sow’s Ear
Most all of our friends have dogs. Just like their humans, they all have different personalities, traits and talent.

Our neighbor’s yellow Labrador, Cooper is a great dog. He retrieves the morning newspaper and is very human compatible. Cooper is ready to play on short notice and you can’t wear him out. Like most Labs, he lives to please his people.

Our friend’s Boxer, Bud, is a rock hound in the strictest sense of the word. He will retrieve any rock that you throw. Not just any rock but, the rock that you tossed into the bushes to try to fool him. It’s no use trying to mess with his mind, you can’t. He always gets his rock and the end result is you’ve just been outsmarted by a dog. Bud can shake hands, roll over, play dead and will even give you a high five. You gotta love a dog named after a beer, don’t ya?

Ashley the Schnauzer rings a bell to go outside and rings another to come in. Her owners keep a list of her vocabulary and are constantly adding to the words that she understands. Anyone who has ever had a Schnauzer knows that they are smart but, Ashley is somewhat of an over achiever.

The point is that the Bobster just doesn’t do any of this stuff. Early on, I was somewhat frustrated that Bobby just didn’t get it. I was wrong. He got it, he just didn’t want it. I finally accepted the fact that if I wanted a bell ringing, newspaper retrieving dog to give me a high five after reciting his vocabulary then this hound was not a good choice of dogs. Beagle Boy’s talent is in other areas. And, these areas are not as obvious as with most other dogs.

You know that Roberto can habla espanol but did you know that he does math? It’s true; he could be a K-9 accountant if he wanted to.
Bob knows what stuff is his and he is very protective of his stuff! He has some of his stuff inventoried. His stuff includes chew bones, chew toys, his collar, his kennel and his bed. Not long ago Bobby’s Pack Leader decided it was way past time to wash the bed where he hides his rawhide chew bone pieces. These rawhide hunks are Bob’s most prized possessions. Armed with this knowledge, the Pack Leader carefully removed the chew bone hunks and threw the doggie bed into the wash machine.

After drying the bed, she wisely replaced the bone ends in the folds of the doggie bed as best as she could. All this took place under the supervision and close scrutiny of the Bobmiester who is a borderline basket case by this time. Encouraged to hurry it along by a very vocal hound dog, she replaced the bed in its usual place before Bob had a stroke. Bobby then standing in middle of his bed and with his nose, points to each and every chew bone hunk. You can actually see the tally taking place. Exhausted after having reconciled his inventory, he settles in for his afternoon siesta while the Pack Leader and I enjoy the peace and quiet.

The Newest Member of the All Boy Beagle Band
A Friend of my wife told her that her husband has brought home a new Beagle puppy on a “trial basis.” The little boy had the dog named before his mom got home. Good luck with that “trial basis” thing. A politician in Gray County was once told to: “Look for the agenda behind the agenda.” Wiser words were never spoken when it comes to dealing with some people and all Beagles. We are looking forward to the day Bob and Ben the Beagle race through our backyard while howling their lungs out. Few people can resist the charms of a little Beagle pup but, since they are manipulating, devious little suckers, be sure to look for their hidden agenda.


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